Friday, June 25, 2004

Ladyfest Seattle opening night

Give me signeage or give me death
CHAC, Seattle

I was excited for this show - art! fashion! theatre! music! But you know how when you're a little bit cranky and then one or two minor things happen and it sours the whole night for you? Yeah, me too.

The crowd was arty arty arty. I'm not sure if the people in costumes and face paint and such were performers watching other performers, or if they were in the spirit of - wait - this isn't a costume festival, is it? I thought it was just about girls performing and stuff.

After a couple of performances my friend and I got ourselves a drink from the bar upstairs. Then we decided to go downstairs and check out the music. But you can't GET downstairs from the upstairs - you have to go outside the building and around and down the alley thing. There must be stairs somewhere, but they were just not accessible. So my friend asks a staff guy if we can bring our drinks outside and around, and he says "I'm not sure" so we do it anyway. And then when we get downstairs this gal says "are those cocktails? You can't leave the building and go outside with those." But the thing is, now we're in the building again. So we say "ok, now we're going to leave the building AGAIN and take them outside to get back inside." Signeage, people. Just a little sign that says "Don't take your drinks outside". This would be helpful.

So back upstairs we go to finish our drinks (well, I had finished mine so I finished my friends' too) and watch one more performance. We managed to flee before the Butoh-inspired performance art thank GOD. And back downstairs, drinkless.

Next was the lovely and talented Anna Oxygen. You know that girl you went to high school with who was really plain and a bit weird, but then you realized years later that she was actually far far cooler than you and all of your friends the whole time? That's Anna.

Anna's most sincere fans (who sang along, which is odd because I didn't think Anna sang the same words every time) were the most androgynous. And that kind of makes sense because even though Anna was wearing skin-tight leggings with spotted underwear over top plus a tight tank top, she managed to be completely non-sexual herself. The smallish crowd at the front followed all of Anna's instructions on how and when to dance, using exactly what style. People love receiving directions from a band. It gives them purpose and guarantees that they won't look stoopit to other people.

There was this girl sitting in a comfy chair right in front of me who I SWEAR colored her hair MAYBE 2 hours before the show. Overwhelming Loreal Finesse smell. And she put her hair into and out of a ponytail at least four times in like a half hour. I know why, too - that Intensive Conditioning Treatment makes your hair so soft and floppy you just can't make it do anything for like 2 days after using it. I think she used Deep Mahogany.

Next was the KILL ME CUTE Buttersprites. I love bands with a "look" and these girls had that down. They brought out a larger crowd, many of whom sported arm band tattoos and cat eye glasses. The people loved this band, and many moved closer in hopes of absorbing some of their cuteness. For god's sake their mailing list had pink stamps all over it and a giant felt flower at the top of the clipboard. How could you NOT sign up?

One guy right near me looked like he was plucked right out of 1993 and has been waiting for grunge to come back ever since. Possibly from that same chair. But he liked the Buttersprites too.


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